The Art World Naughty List for 2015
From one lump of coal to ten, the art world's naughtiest, ranked.
This is the time of year when children are reminded that Santa has made a list and checked it twice, and that he’s gonna find out who’s naughty and nice. But we all know that not everyone in the art world has been very nice this year.
Who are the art world’s most mischievous malefactors? We’ve ranked the top 10 naughtiest art world figures this year, deciding who gets the most lumps of coal in their stocking this Yuletide.
1. Leonardo DiCaprio Cuts the Line
When you’re a global celebrity movie star, a heartthrob art collector, and an environmental activist to boot, you don’t expect to stand in line with the rest of them. So we weren’t really shocked when we learned that Leonardo DiCaprio had cut the line at a mobbed Mike Kelley show at Hauser & Wirth in September.
All things considered, we give Leo one lump of coal.
2. Julian Schnabel Barks at Miami Crowd
When you’re a world-famous artist and an arguably even better director, you expect respect, even if it’s at a party, and even if it’s during Art Basel Miami Beach. So it’s not that shocking that Julian Schnabel dropped an F-bomb when people wouldn’t stop chatting during a speech he gave at a celebration of artist and restaurateur Michael Chow earlier this month.
All things considered, we give Schnabel two lumps of coal.
3. Liz Hurley Kicked Out of Bed at the V&A
Even Liz Hurley should know that you don’t touch things in museums. So we were kind of shocked when, even after the alarms went off and she was booted from the museum, she posted a shot of herself on Instagram, sitting on a 16th-century bed at London’s Victoria & Albert Museum. Somehow, she still thought that was cute.
Movie star or no, Liz, you get three lumps of coal.
4. Richard Prince Pilfers Your ‘Grams
This was a big year to hate appropriation artist Richard Prince. The prince of provocation mounted a 2014 show in which he aimed to update his appropriation game for the 21st century by simply printing other people’s Instagrams onto canvas and selling them for big bucks, prompting widespread outrage and causing critic Paddy Johnson to pen the essay “Richard Prince Sucks.”
But that’s not all! This year, he put salt in the wound by trotting them out again at Gagosian’s Frieze art fair booth.
So, for not taking the hint, Richard Printstagram, you get four lumps of coal.
5. Drake Does Not Have a Hotline to James Turrell
Speaking of thievery, hip-hop giant Drake appeared to rip off Light and Space artist James Turrell in the video for his smash-hit single “Hotline Bling.” Distinctly Turrell-like environments provide the unlikely setting for the rapper to lament the loss of his former lover’s late-night booty calls. Turrell disowned the video, clearly stating, “neither I nor any of my woes was involved in any way in the making of the ‘Hotline Bling’ video.”
Drake, we give you no bling and no booty calls, but rather five lumps of coal.
6. You Call That a Warhol?
Stevens auction house in Mississippi got the attention of Warhol experts this summer when it sold what it claims is a portrait of Coco Chanel by the Pop master. “It looks more like Caitlyn Jenner than Coco Chanel,” said former Andy Warhol Museum director Tom Sokolowski, adding, “it even looks like it was painted by Caitlyn Jenner!”
Stevens, you’ve just placed your bid on six lumps of coal.
7. Georg Baselitz, We Can’t Even with You Anymore
German painter Georg Baselitz is beyond naughty, repeatedly heading back to the pulpit granted him by the German media to opine about how women don’t make great painters—never mind the fact that artists like Georgia O’Keeffe and Louise Bourgeois have outperformed him at auction.
We hope we won’t hear from you again, but for now, Herr Baselitz, you’ve earned yourself seven lumps of coal.
8. Loris Gréaud: Sexist or Sociopath?
Baselitz isn’t the only misogynist in the art world. French artist Loris Gréaud earned the art world’s opprobrium when he harassed a Dallas critic for putting down his show, telling her she needed to get laid more. Then he claimed he had punked us all, though he hadn’t let his target in on it, prompting our critic Ben Davis to ask, “Is Loris Gréaud an Angry Chauvinist or an Art World Sociopath? Or Both?”
For even making us ask the question, Monsieur Gréaud, Père Noël has brought you eight lumps of coal.
9. Marina Abramović Has Jay-Z’s Money. No, She Doesn’t. Wait, She Does.
Performance artist Marina Abramović dropped a bombshell this past spring when she accused rapper and art collector Jay Z of failing to follow through on a promised donation to her eponymous institute. But it wasn’t Hova who had been naughty, it turns out. artnet News spoke to “Picasso Baby” video producer Jeanne Greenberg Rohatyn of Salon 94, who kept the receipt. Making matters worse, Abramović then let her institute take the blame.
For unwarranted trash-talking and for doing away with personal responsibility, we hereby follow through on our donation to the institute of … nine lumps of coal.
10. Jerry Saltz. Just Jerry Saltz.
Getting kicked off Facebook for sexual images. Disowning Klaus Biesenbach. Publishing his ATM receipts. Posting the filthiest images he can find to his Instagram. Everyone loves him, and everyone knows it’s because he’s so … what’s the word? … naughty.
For being the naughtiest art critic we know, Jerry, you win the big prize, ten lumps of coal.
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