10 Important Questions We Have About the New Emojis Coming Our Way

Our thoughts on your latest texting options.

The new emoji for 2017. Courtesy of Emojipedia.
The new emoji for 2017. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Having a full conversation using images in lieu of words has become more and more possible, thanks to the magic of emoji, those tiny little faces and graphics that have shot to popularity since being added to the American iPhone in 2011. (The original emojis joined the collection of New York’s Museum of Modern Art last year.) Soon, there will be more words in the emoji vocabulary: Emojipedia has announced the release of 69 new symbols.

So get ready for a new vomiting smiley, an elf that looks like Legolas from Lord of the Rings, and food items including a sandwich and a head of broccoli, all coming soon to a smartphone near you on June 30. Each phone and social media network will develop its own version of these symbols once the official rollout takes place, but Emojipedia’s versions were released on March 27.

With that in mind, here a few thoughts on the new emojis, based on the initial images provided by Emojipedia.

Gloves emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Gloves emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

1. Why are the disembodied hands so creepy?
I can’t imagine a ton of instances where I would feel compelled to text someone a pair of gloves—maybe to explain that my hands were cold and that my gloves were about to limit my ability to text?—but if I were to do so, I think I’d prefer gloves lying flat, in repose, rather than these creepy outstretched little guys, which look kind of like a Robert Gober art piece.

Breast-Feeding emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Breast-Feeding emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

2. What is going on with the breast-feeding lady?
I’m all for women being able to feed their babies in whatever way is most comfortable for them. This just kind of looks like a woman on a business trip with an exotic cocktail served in a coconut.

Woman and Man in Steamy Room emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Woman and Man in Steamy Room emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

3. What’s with the oddly surreal naked people?
Apparently, this lady is at the sauna, a favorite activity of the people of Finland. That thing that looks like a magical wizard staff? According to my research into sauna culture, she’s using it to add water to the coals and increase the humidity. (The ladle is called a kauha in Finnish.)

Curling emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Curling emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

4. Curling?
I guess the Winter Olympics are coming up in 2018, but outside of that two-week period every four years, how many people were really clamoring for this one?

Child, Adult, and Older Adult emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Child, Adult, and Older Adult emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

5. Will the emoji gender revolution continue? 
Given the prevalence of questions of gender identity today, the three new gender-neutral emoji, depicting a child, adult, and elderly person, make sense. But then, that just points to how, given the strides to make female versions of traditionally male emoji, and vice versa, the next step must be to introduce non-gendered versions of all the emoji careers, no?

Mermaid and Man Genie emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Mermaid and Man Genie emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

6. Will Disney have any copyright concerns? 
The new mermaid emoji is a total Ariel (and also bears quite a resemblance to Copenhagen’s famed The Little Mermaid statue). Get rid of the turban from the new genie emoji, and it’s a ringer for Robin Williams’s character from Aladdin.

Canned Food emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Canned Food emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

7. When are we getting contemporary art emojis? 
This can of tomatoes is so achingly close and yet so far from the classic Andy Warhol soup can.

T-Rex and Sauropod emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

T-Rex and Sauropod emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

8. How was there not already a dinosaur emoji?
This seems like a huge oversight.

Orange Heart emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Orange Heart emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

9. How many heart emojis do we really need?
Jim Dine, rejoice: The orange heart emoji joins the classic red heart, but also similar variations in green, purple, yellow, and blue, as well as a sparkling heart, revolving hearts, a broken heart, and a smiling face with heart-eyes. Love’s great and all, but I think we have enough ways to say I love you in emoji at this point.

Brain emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

Brain emoji. Courtesy of Emojipedia.

10. What’s going on with the terrifying brain emoji? 
If any emoji needs a redesign before going live, it’s this fleshy pink nightmare!


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